Helen and the several dwarfs

Once upon a time (not so long ago) in a land (we sometimes wish) was far away, a woman called Helen wandered into a forest (more like a jungle) and discovered seven men who were dwarfed by a number of problems. This was the start of what would be a traumatic four years for poor Helen, who herself was suffering already from democraticellusion, backtrackingquickly and a number of other ailments.

The first man, sir shower-alot, had created much enthusiasm for himself largely by playing on the dreams of the masses that they would one day be able to have an ego like his. He had a number of wives, girlfriends and assorted other womanly 'possessions' with whom he had his way, when he wanted and how he wanted. He also had a superpower which allowed him to remove the traces of disease and illness, simply by showering. His power was so strong that he didn't even mention anything about protex or dettol but was able to use regular showers for these purposes.

The second man, sir foot-in-the mouth, also had created a great deal of energy around him. Sadly for him though, this energy was not always positive, but this did not stop him from enjoying his position as general chatterbox and know-little. He was dwarfed by his lack of knowledge, and desire to use the anger of others to fuel his own energy. He said what he thought, even when what he thought was not at all sensible or useful.

The third man, sir i'm-the-boss-not-you, created many problems for Helen. He refused to share any of the jungle resources with her, until she did exactly what the dwarf colony wanted - even if she had very good reasons not to. He often used his role of jungle king to communicated the messages of the dwarf colony to her, and sadly to the world beyond the jungle. He was dwarfed by his inability to share.

The fourth man, sir inandoutof-jail, also had magical powers. This man, through surrounding himself with other men who had superpowers (like sir shower-alot), was able to move through physical barriers, like jail cells. The combined power of his and other superpowers allowed him to fly above things (even the law). However, sir inandoutof-jail was only holidaying in the jungle, because he actually had a house somewhere else, and was a bit shaky from the jungle noises. He was dwarfed by charges.

Upon meeting these men, Helen was slightly alarmed. She wondered about how the jungle was run, and how she too would become part of the leadership of the jungle. She thought very long and hard about this question. Despite not wanting to act badly, she came to a conclusion.

If its monkey business that runs the jungle, she just had to act like one of the monkeys herself. And if it is male monkeys who run the jungle, best she surround herself with some of her own monkeys from her land.